You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
Randomize
