i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
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