Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
Randomize
