Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
Randomize
