Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Randomize
