Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
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