his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
maybe you met your husband and you just don't know it yet
and other hilarious jokes you can tell yourself
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