"it" just moved
How was dinner with ur grandparents?
I was really blazed and scared they'd catch me, so when they asked about my day I was concentrating really hard on not saying smoking that instead I honestly said "Well, I had sex on your pool table, Nana."
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
Randomize
