would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
Note to self: Don't go home with a recent divorcee. Semen and tears.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
Just got hit on by a 28-year old, quadraplegic, triple-cancer-survivor redneck. Now updating bucket list to meet newfound standards.
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
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