Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
Randomize
