one word: firstdatebathroomanal
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
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