Babe! I just farted and I swear to jesus lord christ that it sounded like ur name! Ok, more like Meeatt but still... awesome.
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you.
You're the best wingman ever.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize
