Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
She dumped me and then asked if I wanted to come to her improv show. Fuck theatre majors, man.
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
