i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
Randomize
