Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
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