Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
Bubblewrap condoms. We can steal Ziplock's new slogan. Protection you can hear.
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
Be still, my beating vagina.
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
Randomize
