I woke up at 7am naked in my bathtub with the shower running. My apartment was so full of steam that my ceiling was dripping. Who thought it would be okay for me to get my own place, anyway?
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
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