i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
Randomize