you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
Randomize
