i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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