She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize
