yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
I think I deserve the nobel peace prize for discovering that one should smoke before drinking instead of drinking before smoking.
Getting a high five from your dog when you're stoned is one the greatest rewards of being a pet owner.
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
Randomize
