I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
I just noped my wife on Tinder. Turns out I was the second one to find out that we both have it.
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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