There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
I told her I'd give her some of the cream I was using so she didn't get my warts. That's when I realized I was too drunk.
Just got booked to do a bachelorette party for a polygamist wedding. And notice I only text you to rub things in your face and show you my life shits on yours. Daily.
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Randomize
