Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
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