my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
Randomize
