the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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