i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
Nah the bridesmaids all had dates. I slept with the next best thing: girl who WANTED to be a bridesmaid but didnt make the cut.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
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