I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
I think my moral compass just broke
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