sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
My drug dealer just texted me that his kid had a rough sleep and was running late to deliver the ounce to my office. Totes adorbs.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
Randomize
