That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
Randomize
