Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
Randomize
