he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
He and I are in a competition of who can sleep with the most people at work. We're tied at two. I could win this if they'd stop hiring damn straight girls.
It's okay I didn't send any nudes tonight so we are safe *inserts photo of a baseball umpire doing the safe signal*
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
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