I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
At this point, I would light birthday candles in my vagina for free drinks
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
Well I just put wine in my tea
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
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