And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
Randomize
