No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
"Don't get as drunk as I was on my birthday" has been upgraded from a goal for Friday night to a goal for my life in general.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize