the day after is always just damage control
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
Randomize