Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
I feel like my map app knows I'm hungover and is strategically not driving me by fast food places so I cannot stop
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
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