i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day.
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
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