But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
These tits shall not be calmed
I hummed the theme from jaws while she was taking the pregnancy test....needless to say she was not pleased
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
Randomize
