I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
Randomize
