Sry I called you an 8
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
Randomize
