Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
Randomize
