She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize
