grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
Look, all I'm saying is that you're going to be a great Vodka Mom.
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
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