hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
Posting happy birthday to my grandpa on Facebook.... Then realizing my profile pic is me dressed as a slutty cop when he used to be a police officer.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
A+ Viking dick
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
Randomize
