You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
Randomize
