I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
You just can't finish a sentence that starts with "I may have drunk peed in the bed" with "do you mind if I skip work and sleep here?" Anyways, yeah still drunk at work.
I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
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