Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
Fuck appropriateness.
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
Randomize
