in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
Had to use Google translator to be able to tell the cleaning lady not to throw away the condoms we have strategically placed throughout the house.
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
Randomize
