i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
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